watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Randomize
