Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize