Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
