chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
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