So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
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