Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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