i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
