As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize