so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
