garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
