Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
