When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
