So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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