Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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