So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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