So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
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