Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
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