She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
