how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Randomize