Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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