I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
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