paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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