Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
