you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize