Got a toothbrush?
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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