and you said cock pushups were impossible
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
