all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
