How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
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