It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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