i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
