I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
