I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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