I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
