it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize