You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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