I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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