I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
