I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
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