butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
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