just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
