People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
