How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
