i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
