walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
