Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
