Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
