I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
this will be a night to untag.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Randomize
