Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
i think my tv is drunk
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Randomize
