whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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