with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
